Some people say: To measure the charm of a woman, just look at the man next to her.
Among the many talented women in the Republic of China, Lin Huiyin must be a graceful and charming woman.
Looking at the men around her: the poet Xu Zhimo insisted on divorce for her, the architect Liang Sicheng carefully cared for her throughout her life, and the philosopher Jin Yuelin lived in the woods and protected her for life...
< p> Among the various rumors circulating in the world, the emotional entanglement between Lin Huiyin and Jin Yuelin has always been an unsolvable mystery;There is even such a saying:
One day, When Liang Sicheng returned from his investigation in Baodi, Lin Huiyin said to him with a sad face: I am very distressed because I fell in love with two people at the same time and I don’t know what to do.
The two people she fell in love with at the same time were her husband Liang Sicheng and Jin Yuelin who was by her side all day long.
This statement may not be credible; but it is undeniable that Jin Yuelin lives in the woods and never leaves, but it is a sincere and affectionate thing that can be seen.
So, in this affectionate companionship of "living in the forest", what do Lin Huiyin, as the party concerned, and Liang Sicheng, as the husband, think of Jin Yuelin's behavior?
To answer this question, we might as well start with the "wife's living room" of that year.
Around the 1930s, No. 3 Zongbu Hutong in the north of Peking City was the home of Lin Huiyin and Liang Sicheng, and it was also a gathering place for cultural celebrities in the capital circle.
Every weekend, these academic masters always gather here to have impromptu talks about literary creation.
For this reason, this cultural salon is called "the wife's living room" by the outside world.
In 1931, the salon culture in Beiping City became a trend; as a famous philosopher, Jin Yuelin came to the "wife's living room" at the invitation of Xu Zhimo, and got to know the extraordinary talker and temperament. The hostess Lin Huiyin.
When they first met, Jin Yuelin was immersed in Lin Huiyin’s charm. He was pleasantly surprised to find:
Whether it is literature, architecture, or art, as long as it is a topic spoken by others, Lin Huiyin They can all talk freely and even have more unique and novel opinions. After a salon gathering, figures such as Zhu Guangqian, Ba Jin, Shen Congwen, Xu Zhimo and others have all become Lin Huiyin's foils.
Jin Yuelin used to be an outstanding scholar on the Tsinghua campus, with rigorous and clear logical thinking; but who would have thought that since meeting Lin Huiyin, Jin Yuelin seems to have become delicate and emotional.
At that time, he had a rumored girlfriend; the passionate American girl once pursued him to China for love; the two also spent some time together, but this relationship made Jin Yuelin feel that it was somewhat After making do with something boring, he sent his girlfriend back to the United States. From then on, Jin Yuelin never had another girlfriend.
For Jin Yuelin: There is an advantage to living alone: ??you can be at home all over the world.
As his relationship with Lin Huiyin became increasingly familiar, Jin Yuelin also began a long journey of "living in the woods".
In "The Memoirs of Jin Yuelin", he once recalled those days like this, he said:
"From 1932 to the summer of 1937, we lived in Beizongbu Hutong, and they (Lin Huiyin and his wife) live in the front yard; I live in the backyard, a small courtyard. The front and back yards are all separate."
After being inseparable for five years, Jin Yuelin and the Liang family became one, so much so that he sighed: " As soon as he leaves the Liang family, he will lose his mind."
In fact, friends who know Jin Yuelin know that it is not that Jin Yuelin cannot live without the Liang family, but that he cannot live without Lin Huiyin. The same thing makes him "unable to see." What made me lose my mind when I arrived was not the sunshine in the living room of the Liang family, the spacious courtyard paved with square tiles, or the subtle fragrance floating in the courtyard, but the woman named Lin Huiyin.
So, what is the life of the three of them like?
According to Jin Yuelin’s recollection: “Except for breakfast at my own home, most of my lunch and dinner were moved to the front yard to eat with the Liang family.”
As an outsider, he Not only was he not excluded by Lin Huiyin and his wife, but he became needed.
Especially for Lin Huiyin: no matter what happens, she needs Jin Yuelin’s advice and help; she regards him as her closest friend and the most important family member; there are even At that time, Lin Huiyin and Liang Sicheng quarreled, and the two even asked Jin Yuelin to be the referee. This harmonious way of getting along became Jin Yuelin's happiest moment.
For the company of Jin Yuelin who "lives in the forest", the smart Lin Huiyin can naturally see through the other person's mind.
This can be easily seen from the letter she wrote to her friend Hu Shi:
"My education is old, and I cannot become a new person. I just need to be "worthy" of people - my parents, my husband (a person who loves me and treats me very well), my son, my family, etc., and later on, I have to be worthy of another person who loves me..."
This "other person who loved me later" was Jin Yuelin, who had been with her for many years.
In fact, from a female perspective: Compared with Liang Sicheng’s silence and rationality, Jin Yuelin seems to understand Lin Huiyin better; during the process of getting along, Jin Yuelin can always accurately guess Lin Huiyin’s thoughts and thoughts. It can be said: the two of them are in love with each other. The fit on the spiritual level is perfect.
But Lin Huiyin is an extremely rational person after all. Her decision to withdraw from her relationship with Xu Zhimo and marry Liang Sicheng was a reflection of her rationality.
Such a sensible woman naturally has her own principles and bottom line for marriage.
Facts have also proved that in getting along with Jin Yuelin, Lin Huiyin showed mostly brother-like dependence and trust;
Likewise: Jin Yuelin's feelings are also decent and thoughtful Unlike Xu Zhimo, who started in chaos and finally gave up, getting involved in his friends' families, Jin Yuelin's love for Lin Huiyin was more of respect and fulfillment.
After Lin Huiyin got tuberculosis, Jin Yuelin introduced famous doctors while busy taking care of her. In order to replenish her health, he even bought her a chicken. The eggs laid by the chickens turned into big chickens, and they were all used to supplement Lin Huiyin's nutrition.
After Lin Huiyin became bedridden, Jin Yuelin never forgot to collect various reading materials and read them to Lin Huiyin...
He accompanied her and took care of her by living in the woods... This deep love and persistence will last until death!
In 1955, Lin Huiyin, who became ill due to overwork, died of a recurrence of lung disease.
After hearing the news, Jin Yuelin, who had always been calm and optimistic, seemed to have lost his soul and cried like a child.
Many years later, his students recalled the scene with lingering fear:
"He didn't speak at first, and then suddenly said: Huiyin is gone... As he spoke, I just cried loudly and leaned on the desk with my arms. I stood beside him quietly, not knowing what to say. It wasn't until a few minutes later that he slowly stopped crying and sat quietly on the chair, his eyes dull. I didn't say anything. I didn't know how to comfort this scholar who had gone through so many changes at this moment, so I sat with him in silence for a while before sending him back to Yandong Garden."
At Lin Huiyin's funeral, people from all walks of life attended. They sent elegiac couplets one after another.
And Jin Yuelin's is particularly eye-catching: "A poetic Qianxun Waterfall, an April day in the world forever."
Because I understand, I am affectionate!
To this day, this sentence is still considered "the best interpretation of Lin Huiyin's life."
Lin Huiyin’s departure seemed to take away all of Jin Yuelin’s expectations.
He used to be eloquent, but he became increasingly silent and even seemed dull.
He always refuses various activities, and is not even willing to go out. It seems that he will be happier if he is trapped in his memory.
Until one time, Jin Yuelin hosted an unprecedented banquet for his old friends.
Friends who received the notice were a little confused: "What happened to Lao Jin? Is there any good news?"
After everyone sat down, Jin Yuelin murmured: "Today It’s Huiyin’s birthday!”
This deep affection moved everyone present!
Jin Yuelin's care for Li Huiyin also made Liang Sicheng sigh: "The person who loves Lin Huiyin the most is Jin Yuelin, and the person who understands her best is also Jin Yuelin."
Lin Huiyin passed away In the 7th year, Liang Sicheng insisted on marrying Lin Zhu as his wife, despite everyone's opposition.
Upon learning the news, Jin Yuelin said nothing.
On Liang Sicheng’s wedding day, he took a pot of wine and peanuts to pay homage to Lin Huiyin’s tomb and stayed alone all night.
He felt bitter in his heart: just as he could not accept the early death of this smart woman, he could not accept Liang Sicheng's insistence on remarrying...
For Jin Yuelin: he could not bear her loneliness. , and couldn't bear that another woman would take her place from now on; he loved her, but could do nothing to help her, so he could only stay with her alone in a lonely grave in the wilderness...
Someone once asked Jin Yuelin. : "How do you evaluate Lin Huiyin?"
His answer was short, but full of affection - what are the words of praise!
It’s hard to understand when I think about it: He has loved her so much in his life, and because of this love, he feels that no words in the world can describe the beauty of this woman.
Ten years of life and death are so vast that you will never forget them without thinking about them!
Many years have passed, and the name Lin Huiyin has been forgotten by many people, unknown to many people, and rediscovered by many people.
In 1983, Mr. Chen Zhongying, who was responsible for publishing Lin Huiyin’s poetry collection, came to visit Mr. Jin Yuelin; he hoped that he could write something for the upcoming collection.
However, Jin Yuelin remained silent.
Time passed by second by second, and the audio tape spun round and round.
No one present could explain Jin Yuelin's expression clearly. They could only feel that the emotional storm of half a century was rapidly steaming and rolling on his face.
After a long time, he pulled away from the memories, and then said word for word, unambiguously:
After saying this, he paused, Then he added more carefully:
Then, he returned to his previous silence, immersed in his memories like a child.
Many years later, Mr. Chen Zhongying, who was in charge of Lin Huiyin’s poetry collection, still clearly remembered the scene of that day:
The afterglow of the setting sun shone in the quiet courtyard, and the elderly gentleman lay Sitting on the wicker chair in front of the house, I closed my eyes and immersed myself in those precious memories; the slowly passing time, covering the soft golden light of the sunset, also shaped the lonely old man into a silent statue.
Jin Yuelin never married and had no children; in his later years, which were dominated by loneliness and longing, Lin Huiyin’s eldest son Liang Congjie was the person Jin Yuelin relied on and trusted the most.
This dependence and trust was just like Lin Huiyin’s treatment of him back then!
Because Jin Yuelin lived with Lin Huiyin and his wife for many years, he also watched Liang Congjie grow up; the relationship between the two was very good. He always regarded Liang Congjie as his biological son, and Liang Congjie also recognized Jin Yuelin as his father. He is affectionately called "Golden Daddy".
As Jin Yuelin got older, Liang Congjie took the initiative to move in with him and took good care of the old man's food and daily life.
Regarding this point, Jin Yuelin once said:
There is comfort and satisfaction in his tone, but also lingering melancholy, loneliness and longing.
Accompanied by Liang Congjie, Jin Yuelin also regained precious happiness in his later years.
When he was young, in order to supplement Lin Huiyin’s nutrition, he learned to raise chickens; during the days when Liang Congjie accompanied him, he still returned to his old profession and raised chickens in the yard; but this time, He raised fighting cocks.
Sometimes when eating, his fighting cock would often stretch its neck up; Jin Yuelin would not chase it away, and would simply have a meal with the big fighting cock.
Liang Congjie’s company allowed Jin Yuelin to find too much lost happiness.
He has always liked children, so he would play with the neighbor's children at the entrance of the alley. He often collected big pears and pomegranates and used them to compete with the children, as if he was an old boy.
For Jin Yuelin: Living in the forest in this life, love and affection are always difficult to express; but the family happiness he enjoyed in his later years made him feel that the silent protection in this life is all. Extremely worth it!
On October 19, 1984, 89-year-old Jin Yuelin died of illness in his residence in Beijing.
He left a will: "After I die... please do not hold a memorial service. Please let the breeze blow away the ashes."
Liang Congjie, who lost his loved one again, took away all Jin Yuelin's descendants. Everything is arranged very carefully.
But this was the only last word that he refused to agree to.
After so many years, it’s not like he didn’t understand the care and dedication of “Dad Jin” to his mother Lin Huiyin; as a younger generation, he always felt that the ties and sacrifices in this life should have their destination.
So, he buried Jin Yuelin's ashes next to his parents' tomb.
In Liang Congjie's view: The three of them had been companions for a long time during their lifetimes, and they would definitely get together under the spring after their deaths.
For Jin Yuelin: He loved Lin Huiyin all his life and protected her all his life.
This love is always rational and restrained. Even though he loves deeply, he has never fought for anything for himself.
But this lifelong longing was finally fulfilled by Liang Congjie.
It is like a destined cause and effect, and also like the generosity and fulfillment of fate. In the final ceremony of life, this infatuated man returned to Lin Huiyin again, comforting all her regrets and protecting her safety with his persistent protection and companionship.
There is no more Jin Yuelin in the world, and the feeling called "love" can never be replicated.
————END————
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