Method 1: Keep busy
Spend more time with family and friends. Sitting alone at home waiting for the other half to come back doesn't make you feel better about their departure, but it may drive you crazy. Instead, try to spend this time with friends or relatives. See this separation as an opportunity to meet old friends. Or, spend some time with your best friends and let them know how important they are to you. Call friends and buy them coffee.
Invite some friends to cook and have dinner at home.
Plan to visit your grandmother at the weekend.
Avoid staying away from people, especially when you think you may be depressed.
2. Spend more time on hobbies. It's very likely that you cut your activity time to make time for your partner, or there are some new activities that you've always wanted to try but haven't found time yet. Instead of sitting there feeling lonely, it is better to seize the free time to finish the model boat or dress.
Start learning a new language through a free mobile app like Fluent English.
Pick up a book you've always wanted to read and start reading.
Make a beautiful work of art to commemorate your relationship. You can use any art or clever method you like, or try something new! You can design cross-stitch patterns according to your initials, your favorite jokes, or your partner's favorite movie characters. Or use different colors and textures to describe how you feel about your partner. You can also make a collage of your favorite photos. Cross-stitch is a hobby suitable for a person to kill time, because it involves a lot of meticulous work and needs to be counted. If you are trying for the first time, you can choose a simple style, so you won't feel depressed or overwhelmed.
Buy some cheap outdoor acrylic paints and canvases at a craft store or Wal-Mart to create an abstract painting. Choose a color that can express your feelings. You can add sand or plaster to create different textures.
Make collages with blank photo frames with or without glass. If there is no glass, stick the photos on cardboard, seal them, or spray varnish to protect them from being damaged.
4. Write a poem, draw a cartoon or write an illustrated story. Create something special to describe your relationship, and when your other half comes back, give it or share it with each other. You can use any creative way you like. Go all out to make a surprise gift and let your partner know how important they are to you. Write an original poem on beautiful flowered paper with a calligraphy pen. It would be better if you could make a piece of paper by hand.
Write a children's book about how you met, with illustrations. You don't need to be good at drawing to make a lovely book that your other half will like. Simple illustrations can add some meaningful details to each scene.
5. Cultivate new relationships. Join a book or film review club. Participating in these activities can give you a chance to get out of the house and make new friends. These things will also take up part of your free time to read or read "homework". Besides, you may make a new good friend, and you may even meet another couple. You can go out with them on date night.
6. Use exercise to distract yourself. When you feel particularly sad and can't do your favorite entertainment, get up and run, ride a bike along the path, or go to the gym to do aerobic exercise for at least 20 minutes. Exercise not only helps to relieve stress and divert your attention from other things, but also causes your body to release endorphins, just like painkillers and emotional boosters. Just five minutes of strenuous exercise can immediately boost your mood, but regular exercise can help relieve long-term depression. Think of exercise as a natural medicine that your body needs to function normally.
7. Finish any unfinished business. Take your time apart as an opportunity to finish some unfinished tasks. It may be something you have started but haven't finished, or something you have been putting off until you have enough time to finish. You will stay busy and be glad that you have finally finished these things. Re-caulk the bathtub, re-polish and repair your grandmother's antique dresser, repair the screen swaying in the wind, and so on.
Finish your short story, make some pillows that you have been saving up to buy, or sign up for the pet training class that you have been planning to go to.
Paint your bedroom, install shelves in the bathroom, or build a vegetable garden.
Method 2: Keep your relationship healthy.
1. It is healthy to accept a period of separation. Regardless of cohabitation or not, in any relationship, a period of separation is a necessary condition for maintaining independence. If you can't stand being apart from each other for a few days, you may be too dependent on each other to get your own happiness and sense of self-worth. Remind yourself that you are a valuable person and don't need others to give you the meaning of life. Try to say, "I am a valuable person. Being alone is healthy for me. "
Being apart gives you a chance to miss your partner, which can remind you how important they are to you. If you haven't been apart, you may start to take the little things that the other person likes for granted.
Don't worry about what your other half is doing. If you find yourself addicted to guessing what your partner is doing when he is not around, whether it's watching something as small as the program you usually watch together or cheating, you may be hiding your fear of being abandoned or injured. Turn your mind to what you can control: how to spend your time. Sometimes it's natural to worry, but being absorbed in these thoughts is a sign of attachment anxiety. People with this problem always expect their partners to prepare for the worst, or always wait for the relationship to end.
3. Call or video chat. If you are too far away to meet, arranging a phone call with your partner can give you some expectations. When we are apart, it is also an opportunity to connect with each other and really talk. Make sure not to call or send text messages often. Evaluate your relationship and think about how long you will be apart and how often you usually talk or meet.
If you know that the other person is busy, you can send a private message by email or WeChat instead of sending a short message, or call the other person's voice mail directly and leave a sweet message. These communication methods will not interrupt your other half's work or family activities, but will bring surprises to the other side.
Try to arrange a special time for each other, such as watching their favorite programs when their partners are away. When you know that the other person is watching the same thing as you, you will feel closer, which will also provide you with some topics to discuss, not just how much you miss each other.
4. Keep your relationship fresh. When you meet, even if you can talk by phone or online video, make sure you don't always do the same thing or say the same thing. Arrange different types of activities for date night. Talk about new topics that we haven't talked about before, or want to know more about each other. If your conversation is stagnant, bring up a news or interesting topic that you have heard recently.
Talk about your childhood. What do you think you want to be when you grow up? What was your favorite pastime when you were a child? What's your favorite Halloween costume?
Look for inspiration and new activities in local newspapers or websites. Ask friends and colleagues who have a partner what they do when they are with their partner to get more ideas.
5. Plan a special activity. Include new activities that you have never done, or you have talked about new activities that you want to try. Or, plan to surprise yourself one day, including something your partner has always wanted to do. Use your imagination! You can plan a whole day around a theme, such as a romantic movie (when Harry meets Sally), or pretend to travel to Paris. Buy a croissant, sit in the cafe outside for a few hours, cross the most beautiful bridge nearby, and then visit the art museum in your city.
Go to the park for a picnic. On the way home, stop by the plant store to buy some flowers you saw before, and then go home and plant them together.
With the theme of "water", arrange to visit the aquarium or science and technology museum, find the largest public fountain in the city, and make a wish with some change (make sure this is allowed! ), and then take a walk along the nearby canal or beach to end the day.
Plan a treasure hunt together Write some clues, take you to different places, remind you of each other, or give them some surprises that you know they will like.
6. Tell your partner that you love him and miss him. The best way to cope with separation and maintain a strong relationship is to exchange your feelings with each other. When you talk, tell the other person that you miss him. Ask your partner what he is doing, share your day with him, and make him feel more connected with you. Remind your partner how much you appreciate him being a part of your life.
Method 3: dredge negative emotions.
1, admit and accept your negative emotions. When you really miss your other half and can't seem to distract yourself from thinking about them, don't continue. Sometimes, trying not to think about someone will only make you miss this person more. Instead, ask yourself why you feel sad or angry at that moment. Once you know why you feel this way, you can do something to deal with it. When you feel eager, ask yourself: Are you bored? Have you ever had a bad day and wish the other person could talk to you about these things? Do you miss what they usually do for you? Go to the movies, call friends and chat, or learn how to cook exotic food.
If you find yourself feeling angry or depressed, try to figure out what these emotions are. Do you feel abandoned, forgotten or insignificant? These may be extreme reactions after breaking up, and they don't reflect your partner's feelings or intentions.
2. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones. When you think, "I miss them so much! I can't stand it anymore, stop and correct these negative thoughts. Instead, adjust your thinking patterns and let them arouse your positive feelings about yourself. Remind yourself that being apart is not necessarily a bad thing. When you find yourself thinking about your time together, stop and focus on the present. It's nice to be alone with a cat (or dog) today instead of "I wish we were together now". Usually she only goes to my partner first. "Turn the feeling of loneliness into a connection with someone or something.
If you are in trouble, use logic to overcome your negative emotions. If you think "I can't be happy without them", then you will definitely feel unhappy. Instead, you admit that you have controlled your emotions and decided to do something else happily at this time.
Cognitive laws are established through hard work. Every time you engage in an activity or think about a meaningful idea, your brain can easily follow this pattern.
It takes time and practice to learn to correct negativity by focusing on positive thoughts. Be patient with yourself and don't make yourself feel worse through self-criticism.
3. Replace longing and sadness with gratitude. It's normal to miss your partner, because you prefer being with them to being apart. Don't be sad, think about how grateful you are to have such a good partner. List what you admire about each other or what they bring to your life. Think about how you get better together: are you more patient, mature and friendly? Have you broadened your horizons and overcome your past fears? Are you proud of learning to consider your loved ones before meeting your own needs?
Deciding to focus on what you have instead of what you don't have doesn't mean that you can't let yourself miss the other half. It's normal to miss someone you care about.
When you feel lonely and want your partner to stay with you, try to form the habit of concentration and focus on thanking you for your time together. You can keep a gratitude diary with you all the time, so that when these emotions appear, you can change your mind immediately.