Feng: Yes, it's me.
Niu: A crosstalk performer.
Feng: It's me.
Niu: I really envy your work.
Feng: Don't say that.
Bull: All talk and no action. After the cross talk, I didn't hurt at all.
Feng: You're going to let us see blood after the cross talk, right?
Niu: My work can't compare with yours.
Feng: Why?
Bull: We were beaten black and blue at both ends in three days.
Feng: Oh, you took part in boxing.
Bull: I am too old.
Feng: Very antagonistic.
Bull: It's too risky.
Feng: That's the spirit!
Bull: Fear and fear.
Feng: Just get used to it.
Bull: I'm afraid someone will catch me.
Feng: You hide quickly.
Bull: If someone catches you, they will fight to the death.
Feng: Then the other team fouled.
Niu: He cares about that. Just a few days ago, six boys hung me up and beat me, swearing while hitting my mouth.
Feng: Why did you curse?
Niu: Let your boy steal your wallet!
Feng: Oh, are you a thief?
Niu: You see, people in this culture speak so badly. What is a thief?
Feng: That should call you-
Bull: Bag thief!
Feng: Is it different? This?
Bull: I've had enough. In order to steal this thing, I have been secretly shrinking all day. Trembling, sneaking around, living a life that is not chic at all. I've had enough. I regret how I became a thief.
Feng: It's good to know.
Bull: It's better to grab the road. Really, if you encounter highway robbery, you will be killed, so as to save your miserable life.
Feng: Well, I said, as long as you make up your mind to correct it, I will try my best to help you.
Niu: Good, sir. That's it.
Feng: Really >
Niu: But they won't spare me if I wash my hands of it completely.
Feng: Did you join the underworld?
Niu: Who's in?
Feng: So-
Niu: The company I joined is called Thief Company.
Feng: Thief company?
Niu: the full name is thief finance co., ltd.
Feng: How many people are there in your company?
Bull: More than one hundred people.
Feng: More than a hundred thieves?
Bull: Not all thieves, only the two of us really insist on working in the front line.
Feng: What about the others?
Niu: They are all leading cadres.
Feng: Do you have any thief companies and leading cadres?
Niu: Hey, you said, "The train runs fast and people sit in the front." . Cadres have a head, thieves have energy, thieves have no leadership, and they must steal badly, or they can't steal or run away. "
Feng: What cadres do you have?
Niu: There are many cadres, one general manager and forty-eight deputy managers.
Feng: Forty-eight people?
Niu: Let's share it.
Feng: What's it to you?
Niu: There are also administration, organization, publicity, logistics and family planning. .
Feng: I'll wait here. Does your thief company still have family planning?
Niu: Well, now that you mention it, the whole country plays a game of chess, and we thieves are no exception. Otherwise, people have family planning, and we thieves are born casually, thieves are born, thieves are born small, thieves are born more and more, and good people are less and less. Who are we stealing?
Feng: You are also doing this for the sake of ecological balance.
Niu: Of course, these departments are all from the higher level to the lower level, and the division of labor is even more detailed.
Feng: What subjects do you have?
Niu: Take this safety plate as an example-=-
Feng; No, wait a minute. What does your thief company want from the security department?
Niu: It is necessary. More than a hundred thieves gathered. If there is no security department, what things in the company will disappear in the blink of an eye? Thieves in our company, 1990, the first document clearly pointed out that the more thieves' nests there are, the more anti-theft work should be strengthened!
Feng: Domestic thieves are hard to prevent.
Niu: Of course, these are permanent institutions. Assuming that there is a central task, many temporary institutions will be added.
Feng: What organizations are there?
Bull: That's a lot. You think it's Spring Festival. You have to set up a spring theft office, right?
Feng: What? Spring thief's office?
Niu: During the Spring Festival, I raided the office, referred to as the Spring Theft Office.
Feng: What about Women's Day on March 8th?
Niu: Set up a female thief office.
Feng: May 4th Youth Day?
Bull: Juvenile thief's office!
Feng: Children's Day?
Bull: Child theft!
Feng: Holidays are not delayed.
Bull: Don't say it's a holiday. Today, we will set up a comprehensive theft office in the super variety show!
Feng: Hey, no!
Niu: Our director came to the scene in person!
Feng: Who is your director?
Niu: Don't tell me, just tell me, our director = = =.
Feng: Who?
Bull: Hou Yuting!
Feng: Comrades, comrades, don't be intimidated by this.
Niu: If you don't do it, this person will be overstaffed. You have to streamline it for several years at the beginning. The more streamlined you are, the more people there will be. I can't help it It's all through the back door From the superior. The cadres must be sent. In fact, this is a very professional unit. . Doesn't mean that individuals come here to be cadres. The layman leads the expert, and there is no accident at the lower level. You say this person can do it, and the people above say no: say this person can't, and the people above say yes, but you can't be angry. There is a couplet circulating in our place, which is very telling.
Feng: What couplets?
Niu: The first part is that you can say yes, but you can't.
Feng: The bottom line.
Bull: You can't say no, and neither can you.
Feng: Horizontal batch
Niu: I can't refuse to accept it.
Feng: You are still a generation of educated thieves.
Niu: The most important thing is to form a team and set an index of several thousand dollars.
Feng: Then steal it.
Bull: It's not easy. You stopped stealing recently.
Feng: That's right.
Niu: In other words, we are short of manpower when people steal big items, and stealing small items is not worth big items. I stole the passbook and dared not take it. I want to steal, but I'm afraid of cheating. It's always heavy You can't steal tens of thousands of dollars a day if you work hard.
Feng: I missed this.
Niu: No, it's too tight to spend.
Feng: As for it?
Omit * and below.
References:
China Crosstalk Network