It's true ~ you don't know what you get until you lose it. What's more, you never know what you have lost before he comes. ※.
Think about your dreams, go where you want to go and do what you want to do, because you only have one life and one chance to do all these things. ※.
Try to put yourself in others' shoes. When you feel hurt, it is very likely that he is hurt, too. ※.
The happiest people don't necessarily have all the best things in the world, just let most of them follow their own lives. ※.
One of the saddest things in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out at the end. ※.
Love begins with a smile, ends with a kiss and ends with a tear. When you were born, you were crying alone and everyone around you was laughing. ※. So please live a good life. When you die, everyone around you is crying, and only you are smiling.
The five most important sentences in life
1, the most cherished sentence: "I love you."
Hearing this sentence means that you have won the love of another person. Is there anything sweeter, more intoxicated, happier and happier than being loved? When you say this sentence, it means that you have found the ideal lover. Looking in the bustling crowd, finally one day, your eyes shine: "it's her (him)!" " "With love, you will no longer be lonely; With love, you will no longer be confused; With love, you will no longer wander; With love, it is no longer easy. Love is a kind of choice, a kind of enjoyment, a kind of motivation and a kind of responsibility.
2. The most comforting sentence: "I am coming."
Everyone needs help most. After a week's hard work, when you want to enjoy a relaxing weekend, you suddenly find that the water pipe at home is broken. When you call the plumber, when he says "I'm coming", you will feel extremely relaxed. When you are driving on a busy road, the car suddenly stops, and the cars behind you queue up again, desperately honking the horn to urge you. At this time, you anxiously call your friends. When he said "I'm coming", your heart fell like a stone.
3. The most confident sentence: "I believe you can do it."
An excellent teacher told me that one of her tricks in educating students is to talk to them alone often. And both students with good academic performance and poor academic performance say to them, "I believe you can do it." So almost all the students she has taught are full of confidence. "Yes" is more "Yes" and "No" is also "Yes". This reminds me of Sun Yat-sen's words: "If you believe it is feasible, it will be successful one day, no matter how difficult it is to move mountains and fill the sea;" If you believe that it is not feasible, it is easy to break branches and there is no expiration date. "Not only students, but also adults. When a person encounters difficulties, makes mistakes or hesitates, if his leader or his friends say "I believe you" and "I think you can do it", then he will soon get up the courage.
4. The person who can get rid of gossip best: "Go your way and let others talk!"
My father once said to me, "If you want what others can't get, you have to pay what others can't." If others rest and you rest, others work and you work, and you live other people's lives, then you can only get what others get. "Indeed, successful people in life always see farther than others, think deeper than others and do more than others. But it is often accompanied by gossip, coldness and even gossip. Therefore, whenever you hear different voices, you should not only check your words and deeds, but also strengthen your determination. " Let people talk! As Lu Xun said: "The approval of cynics is always after the success of reform. "
5. The most difficult and contradictory sentence: "Maybe you are right."
It's like telling a person to lay down his weapon in a fierce battle and admit his mistake in an argument, which is very humiliating. But many times, saying this sentence will put out the burning anger, calm the roaring head, put down your fist and converge different opinions. It can not only avoid a lot of injuries and losses, but also maintain overall unity and stability. This sentence is especially important in family disputes. When couples are arguing about a trivial matter, if one of them says this sentence first, then many contradictions will stop here. In fact, since we have been in love and lived together, what is the reason for fighting to the death? Say "maybe you are right" and nothing will be lost.
biography
1. Misunderstanding:
Early in Alaska, a young couple got married and had children. His wife died in childbirth, leaving a child. He is busy living and looking after the house. He trained a dog because no one helped to look after the children. Dogs are smart and obedient, can take care of children, can bite bottles to feed children and can raise children. One day, the master went out and asked him to take care of the children. He went to another village and couldn't come back that day because of the heavy snow. When he got home the next day, the dog immediately heard the sound and came out to see his master. He opened the door and saw blood everywhere. He looked up, there was blood on the bed and the child was gone. The dog is nearby, and its mouth is full of blood. After discovering this situation, the owner thought that the dog was sexually assaulted and ate the child. In a rage, he cut the dog's head with a knife and killed it. Then I suddenly heard the child's voice, saw him climb out from under the bed and picked him up. Although he had blood on him, he was not hurt. He's weird. I don't know what's going on. Look at the dog's body. There is no meat on his leg. There is a wolf next to him, still biting dog meat in his mouth. The dog saved the little master, but he was killed by the master by mistake. This is really the most amazing misunderstanding in the world.
Note: The misunderstanding is that people are often ignorant, irrational, impatient and lack of thinking.
What happens when you don't understand each other and reflect on yourself in many ways and your feelings are extremely impulsive.
At the beginning of misunderstanding, I always think only of each other's mistakes; So the misunderstanding will get deeper and deeper.
Out of control, people misunderstand ignorant animals and puppies,
There will still be such terrible and serious consequences, and the consequences of this misunderstanding between people are even more unimaginable.
2. Nails:
There was a boy with a bad temper, so his father gave him a bag of nails. And told him that whenever he lost his temper, he would nail a nail in the fence in the backyard. On the first day, the boy nailed 37 nails. Slowly, the number of nails hammered down every day decreased. He found it easier to control his temper than to hammer those nails. Finally, one day, the boy will never lose patience and lose his temper again. He told his father about it, and his father told him that from now on, as long as he could control his temper, he would pull out a nail. Day by day passed, and finally the boy told his father that he had finally pulled out all the nails. My father took him by the hand and came to the backyard, saying, You have done well, my good boy. But look at those holes in the fence. These fences will never be repaired. What you say when you are angry will leave a scar like these nails. If you stab someone with a knife, no matter how many times you say you're sorry, the wound will last forever. The pain of words is as unbearable as the real pain.
Note: People often get hurt forever because of some persistent insistence.
If we can all start from ourselves and start to be tolerant of others, I believe you (you) will receive many unexpected effects ... helping others open a window is to let themselves see a more complete sky. ....
3. Wait a minute:
Most of my colleagues are very excited because a new director who is said to be very capable has been sent to rectify the company. However, as the days passed, the new supervisor did nothing. Every day, he walks into the office politely and hides in it. It's rare to go out. Those nervous bad elements are even more rampant now. "He is an artist there! He is very nice, and he is more gullible than the previous supervisor! Four months later, just when I was really disappointed in the new director, the new director lost his temper-all the bad guys were fired and the capable people were promoted. He started quickly and judged things accurately, and he was almost like a completely different person from the conservative one in April. At the year-end dinner, the new supervisor made a speech after three rounds of drinking: "I believe everyone must be puzzled by my performance during my new arrival and the radical measures taken later." Now listen to a story and you will understand: "I have a friend who bought a house with a yard." As soon as he moved in, he cleaned up the yard thoroughly, cleared all the weeds and planted his newly bought flowers. One day, the original owner visited. My friend just found out that he actually used peony as a grass shovel. Later, he bought another house. Although the yard was more messy, he stayed where he was. Sure enough, plants that were thought to be miscellaneous trees in winter bloomed in spring. I thought spring was a weed, but summer turned into brocade; A small tree that hasn't moved for half a year turns red in autumn. It was not until late autumn that it really realized which plants were useless and vigorously eradicated and preserved all precious vegetation. " Speaking of which, the supervisor raised his glass:
"Let me propose a toast to all of you here, because if this office is a garden, you are all rare trees inside. Rare trees can't blossom and bear fruit all year round, you can only recognize them by long-term observation! 」
4. generosity:
This is the story of a soldier who has just returned from the Vietnam War.
He called his parents from San Francisco and told them, "Mom and Dad, I'm back, but I have a reluctant request. I want to take a friend home. " "Of course!" They replied, "We will be glad to see it. But my son went on. But there's one thing I want to tell you first. He was seriously injured in the Vietnam War and lost an arm and a foot. Now he is desperate. I want to invite him back to live with us. " I'm sorry, son, but maybe we can help him find a place to live. The father went on to say, "Son, you don't know what you are talking about. Disabled people like him will bring a great burden to our lives. We have our own lives to live, and we can't let him ruin them like this. I suggest you go home first and forget about him. He will find his own sky. Just then, he hung up and his parents never heard from him again. A few days later, the parents got a call from the San Francisco Police Department, telling them that their dear son had fallen to his death. The police think this is just a simple suicide case. So they flew to San Francisco heartbroken and led by the police to the morgue to identify their son's body. That's their son, yes, but surprisingly, the son has only one arm and one leg. The parents in the story are like most of us. It's easy to like people who look good or talk funny, but it's too difficult to like people who bring us inconvenience and unhappiness.
We are always more willing to keep our distance from those who are not as healthy, beautiful and intelligent as us.
However, thank God, some people are not so cruel to us.
They will love us without regrets, and they will always accept us no matter how bad we are.
Before you go to bed tonight, pray to God for strength to accept others, no matter who they are. Ask him to help us meet people who are different from us.
There is a magical thing called "friendship", which is hidden in everyone's heart. You don't know how and when it happened, but you know it always brings us special gifts.
You will also understand that friendship is the most precious gift given by God!
Friends are like rare treasures. They bring laughter and inspire us to succeed.
They listen to our inner words and share every compliment with us.
Their hearts are always open to us. Tell your friends how much you care about them now.
Imagine: my friend, after you have finished watching it all the way; There must be deep feelings.
Then, before you make a decision and judge others, first of all, please think about whether this is a "misunderstanding". Then, please consider whether you must nail this "nail" and "start slowly" if possible.
Because when you forgive others, you are also forgiving yourself.
Pathological Psychology in Social Communication
People living in the world must participate in social communication, and the scope of social communication has a great relationship with everyone's occupation, hobbies, lifestyle and geographical location. But in real life, why do some people always fail to make friends in social life, or all their friends who have made friends for a long time have left him, and they usually have a bad relationship with their colleagues? The reason is that this kind of person's psychological state in social communication is not good, which hinders the normal development of interpersonal relationship, and this psychological state is actually the morbid psychology in social communication. The more common ones are as follows:
First, inferiority Some people are prone to inferiority complex, even look down on themselves, lack self-confidence, have no courage to do things, are timid, follow suit, and have no opinions of their own. If this kind of psychology is not overcome, it will wear away people's unique personality.
Second, cowardice mainly exists in people who are inexperienced, inexperienced, introverted and inarticulate. Because of cowardice, even if you think it is right in social communication, you dare not express it after careful consideration. This kind of psychology will also be observed by others, and as a result, they have opinions on themselves and are unwilling to become good friends.
Third, suspicion Some people often look at each other with distrust when socializing or entrusting friends to do things. They are suspicious for no reason, catching shadows and making irresponsible remarks. For example, some people entrust their friends to do things, but when they do things themselves, they will ask others what their friends said. As a result, the relationship between friends was affected.
Fourth, rebellious psychology Some people always like to argue with others to show that they are unconventional. For anything, whether it is right or wrong, I think it is bad if you say yes; If you're right, I'm wrong, making others dislike themselves.
5. Game Psychology Some people regard making friends as an accidental entertainment. They are eager to make friends, have changeable ideas, deal with people everywhere, love to brag and say beautiful words. When they meet someone, they will say how deeply they are in contact with someone. This kind of interpersonal communication is only superficial, so there are no friends with deep feelings.
6. Greedy psychology Some people think that the purpose of making friends is to "use each other", in order to meet friends who are useful to themselves and can bring benefits to themselves, and often "kick down the ladder". This bad psychology of greedy for money will damage a person's personality.
7. Indifference Some people are indifferent to all kinds of things that have nothing to do with themselves, or mistakenly think that sharp words, aloof attitude and domineering are "personality", which makes others afraid to get close to themselves, thus losing some friends.
Five Ways to Easily Eliminate Mental Fatigue
Many people's psychological activities are an extra psychological burden, because many times anxiety and worry are of no help at all. A famous American university surveyed 2842 workers who worked more than 65438000 hours a week. The results show that "there is no necessary connection between overtime and work anxiety."
Indeed, many times we feel tired, more because we can't find fun and sense of value in our work, and psychologically regard it as a heavy burden. Carrying this burden makes us feel particularly tired. In addition, many people always repeat monotonous activities in their work and life, and lack of change will inevitably lead to psychological fatigue.
Then, how can we eliminate psychological fatigue, let our mood relax and feel happy and beautiful?
The first trick: look at the world from another angle
The reason why we can't immerse ourselves in what happened at a special moment is that we pay too much attention to some vital purposes and neglect to discover and appreciate many beautiful things. Driving to work, instead of worrying about an hour's drive to work, it is better to devote your mind to every detail of a beautiful morning. Perhaps a crisp bird song can make you feel happy, and the flowers that have just bloomed can make you feel refreshed and leave a good mood for your work unit.
The second trick: throw away the shackles of perfectionism.
It is human nature to make mistakes. The more tolerant we are to ourselves, the more relaxed we are.
The third trick: find one or two confidants.
When we are upset, we may not need others to talk too much about the truth. More often, we hope that psychological depression and troubles can be spit out quickly. Therefore, close "close friends" are naturally an indispensable part of life. Listening to friends can help you clear your mind, and understanding from friends can give you support and encouragement. Try to find your best friend.
The fourth measure: let life change more.
You might as well use your brain and change your lifestyle, such as buying a cookbook, trying to cook some fresh dishes, or finding some reasons to have a candlelight dinner for the whole family once in a while. Whether the time to watch TV regularly every day can be changed to go out for a walk and exercise. On holidays, the whole family will travel. In a word, you can try whatever you can, and maybe just a small change can have an unexpected effect.
The fifth measure: "thinking" can also eliminate fatigue.
Psychologists have found that "thinking" helps to eliminate the tension and fatigue in work and life, and plays a role in relaxing body and mind. When you feel tired, sleepy and bored, just think about it. You can imagine that you went back to your honeymoon with your husband, your salary doubled because of your excellent work performance, and your baby grew up little by little ... In short, as long as you are happy and intoxicated, your mind can wander around. However, this kind of rambling paranoia is only a supplement to daily life and is by no means a substitute. Enough is enough, putting the cart before the horse is not enough.
interpersonal attraction
Positive feelings and attitudes of mutual love between people. Also known as interpersonal charm. Interpersonal attraction makes individuals in a positive psychological state and helps to meet various needs of individuals in interpersonal relationships.
The main reasons that affect interpersonal attraction are as follows:
1, first impression. The first impression or contact is the focus of many early empirical studies. It is found that the initial impression dominates a person's subsequent behavior towards another person in the world, making him make a behavioral response consistent with this impression, thus strengthening the first impression. This is also in line with general experience. When individuals have a good first impression on each other, they usually think that they have good qualities and characteristics, and they will be attracted to each other. These three are closely related.
2. appearance. People of all ages like attractive people. Attractive appearance is often considered to be more likely to have personality traits that meet the needs of society, such as intelligence, intelligence, kindness, humility and sociability. There is also evidence that appearance has a greater influence on the attractiveness of men to women than that of women to men. In addition, in a particular culture or subculture, the attractiveness of people's appearance is quite consistent, but what specific attributes or their different combinations can be determined as handsome or beautiful appearance is still poorly understood.
3. behavior. Personal behavior will affect the impression you leave on others. Because, the impression is often obtained by a person after observing the behavior of others and the background in which it appears. Attribution research also points out that people tend to attribute another person's behavior to the corresponding personality characteristics. For example, the hostile behavior is attributed to attack, and the helping behavior is attributed to kindness. This often greatly affects whether you like a person and then be attracted, or hate and then be rejected. There is also evidence that liking and then attracting will be influenced by non-verbal behaviors such as smiling, eye contact and body posture. On the other hand, the influence of speech acts mainly focuses on the disclosure of friendly information by individuals. However, contrary to the previous theoretical generalization, there is no regular influence between the degree of disclosing a person's friendly information and making it attractive. The effect of self-disclosure seems to change with the environment of information disclosure, and whether the disclosed information meets the needs of society is particularly important.
4. similarity. Many laboratory research websites strongly prove that the attraction of others to us will increase with the increase of their similarity to themselves in terms of views, interests and personality characteristics. The reason may be that similar people will think of our views, interests, personality characteristics and so on. They are all appropriate and meet the requirements, so expressing similar views or interests will have a reinforcing significance, and expressing different views or interests will have a punitive significance. Another possibility is that similarity provides individuals with information from another person, thus affecting attractiveness. Most people always think that their opinions, interests and personality characteristics are valuable, and people who are similar to themselves in these aspects will naturally like each other and be attracted. Therefore, the existing empirical research proves that people who are different from us in terms of views, interests, personality characteristics, etc. will be more liked and attracted by us than the same people.
5. ability Admire people who are better than themselves, which is a natural psychological tendency of individuals. Therefore, people always like people with strong abilities. It should be pointed out that those who have certain abilities, but may occasionally make some small mistakes, are often more attractive.
6. close. On the premise of meeting each other's needs, the more intimate individuals are, the more they will attract each other. Because proximity provides more betting opportunities for mutual familiarity and more opportunities for mutual reinforcement in contact and communication.
7. complementarity. Refers to interpersonal relationships, if both sides can learn from each other's strengths and make up for each other's needs, they will be more attractive to each other.