Intimate relationship in the family-iron triangle relationship
Triangular structure is the most stable, just like when building a house, there is a design concept called trigonometric law.
This relationship also applies to a family, especially a family of three.
Generally speaking, in many one-child families, children are bound to be closer to one of their parents.
For example, a daughter may be closer to her father in the family; While the son is at home, he may be closer to his mother.
However, if it is a family of three with only one child, then this relationship will be easily unbalanced.
When a child has a particularly close relationship with one parent, the other parent will feel psychologically lacking.
If your family, daughter or son have a very good relationship with his mother, you can say anything in private; But I always keep a distant relationship with my father, so my father will look for this sense of loss.
My father will think: since I can't participate in the family, I will find another "third party".
What does this third party mean? In fact, in every happy family, both husband and wife should have a "third party".
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In a happy family, husband and wife will look for their own "third party"
Let's start with the above.
If the father is in the family, he can't feel the intimacy between the fish and the children, and he can't talk about everything with the children. Compared with his wife, his feelings for his children are slightly alienated.
Then at this time, my husband will find other things to pin his inner feelings.
For example, he may love reading, practicing calligraphy, growing flowers and grass, and even keeping pets.
These hobbies are men's "third party" in the family.
In a family, women are wives and mothers; As a mother, all her energy and feelings, all her cares, may be devoted to her children.
So at this time, as a man, husband and father, he had to find different hobbies to ease his inner feelings.
You can also call it "jealousy"
If your wife whispers to your children every day, but ignores yourself, will you be jealous? Will you be sad?
Therefore, in a happily married family, men will definitely look for other hobbies; Maybe I'm more focused on my career, maybe I'm focused on other hobbies.
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A healthy third party can promote the relationship between husband and wife; An unhealthy third party will only bring down the marriage.
What is a healthy third party in marriage?
It is a hobby that can promote your husband and wife's feelings.
For example, your husband likes to practice calligraphy, read books, grow flowers and grass, and keep pets, so take these hobbies as his second career and invest more energy and concentration.
For example, if your wife likes watching dramas, reading books and baking, then her husband will create more conditions for her to develop this hobby better.
These are all healthy third parties in marriage.
What is an unhealthy third party in marriage? That's the appearance of extramarital affairs.
No matter which party finds an extramarital partner, desertes in marriage and invests in others, these are unhealthy third parties, which do great harm to your marriage.
In a family, a harmonious and happy intimate relationship must be an iron triangle relationship.
When this iron triangle relationship is unbalanced, the feelings in the family will definitely be affected.